Now You See Me, enjoying, Now You See Me!

Sometimes you need to forget logic, perfect story, coherent plot, slick direction ... & surrender to the kid in you, which just wants to enjoy a big summer film, full of magic, an impossible bank heist, pulled off on stage, in front of an audience, indulgently enjoy the eye candy of a great ensemble cast, led by Mr Incredible Hulk, Mark Rufalo & that Bollywood formula, of revenge & justifying robbing from the rich, by giving it back to the people....

On paper, ‘Now you See Me’, has the makings of an epic movie; four magicians, a mentalist (Woody Harrelson), an illusionist (our pretty shopaholic, Isla Fisher), a conjurer (Jesse Eissenberg – quite a jump, from playing a real-life character, facebook creator Marc Zuckerberg, to a magician!) & a card trickster (young David Franco) are brought together to use their combined skills, to rob a bank or two!

Enter Mark Rufalo, the cop on duty and his gorgeous Interpol colleague, who valiantly chase our friendly neighbourhood magicians, who amazingly always are a couple of steps ahead of them.

Oh yes, there is Morgan Freeman, who is the decoder of the magic tricks, Michael Caine, whose presence is a mystery & we still need to figure out the Robin Hood angle of looting the rich & giving back to the not-so-rich & the identity of the person who creates this magical army!

So maybe that why the movie falters a bit – too much in too little time! You don’t really get to sink your teeth into any of the characters because there are too many of them (I personally would have like more time with Mark Rufalo!) & you lose sight of the plot after a while.

But the optimist in me looked at this interesting mes, as the glass being half full – these are great actors & for the price of a ticket, you get to feast your eyes on all of them, thrill at the magic & illusions, enjoy the robber-cop chases, though a tad confused as to who you are cheering, the police or the criminals & while the movie gives you broad hints, it is fun to discover who the brain behind it all is & unravel the ‘Kab, Kyon, Kahaan’ of this cute little whodunit of sorts!

Now You Can See, why I liked seeing, ‘Now You See Me!’

Chennai Express - take me home, to this Southern State, created by Rohit Shetty!

Where my parents failed, to make a nice Tamizh ponnu out of me, ‘Chennai Express’ has succeeded!

I have always had a complex about my Tamizh accent & have been mercilessly teased about it. But with ‘Chennai Express’, the whole of Tamilnadu will have to re-learn their accents, because what I hear Deepika speak, by God, ‘aint the Tamizh I know & can’t speak too well! It made me almost miss the ‘stereotyped fake Tamil accent’ which Bollywood regularly uses, with its roots in ‘Padosan’. Deepika Padukone, ok so you speak Kannada, but surely you sensed that something was wrong with that guttural Tamizh accent?!

I have to pause for more than a moment – to roll on the floor with laughter, at SRK’s declaration, at the ekdum beginning of the CE trailer, that he is a 4o year old – more like 40 going on 65!!!! Dude, either you beg Aamir Khan, to give you that secret formula, which makes him miraculously younger & fitter in every movie, like the curious case of Benjamin Button, or if Jumping Jeetu has any stock left, gulp some spoonfuls of that hilarious tonic, Jeetendra promoted, called ‘Thirty Plus’ (or was it Forty Plus?? My memory fails me, because I am old and foolishly didn’t stock up on 30/40 Plus!!!), because otherwise, you as a 40 year old .... tee hee hee ....

Phuleez ... will someone send one of those last telegrams to Bollywood, informing them that there are regular men in the South! But in case Rohit Shetty is right & the only guys who exist on Planet South are huge, dark, scary, muscular beasts with long curly hair & super thick moustaches, who only snarly ‘Dei’ dangerously & carry chunky weapons, then I need to check, where my husband comes from. All along, in our twenty three years of marriage, my patidev has tricked me into believing, that he comes from a respectable district of Tamilnadu! Hmmmm ... Rohit Shetty knows better!!!

So a la Christopher Columbus, I am setting off on a journey, to seek my roots, in search of that land which Rohit Shetty says is my home:

• The railways stations I know have dully dressed people, stocking up on magazines, water & bananas to tackle the long journey. Much prefer to find the Chennai Express ka station, where lovely lasses wear bright, sexy ‘dhavanis’ – those half saris which our mothers tried to get us to wear, to weddings and functions, before we gratefully graduated to saris.

• My friends in Chennai have such boring backgrounds – their dads work in humdrum regular jobs in banks, hospitals, industries .... only in Chennai Express will I meet a Dhavani clad ponnu, whose father is ‘Don’. Imagine, introducing yourself in your new class in school, ‘Hi! My name is so & so. My mother is a school teacher & my father is a ‘Don’!

• Unlike a good Tamizh ponnu, much to my mother’s disappointment, I did not learn Carnatic Music or Bharatnatyam. But now I discover that I did not learn another dance originating from my state – ‘Kathakali’! Rohit Shetty should have told me earlier – that’s why I have such a large frame – This Tamil gal was built for Kathakali!!!

Like Christopher Columbus, I am setting off, on a journey, to discover this dream place, my homeland, where girls only wear dhavanis, speak a hitherto unknown dialect, the men, like the heroes of Mills& Boon romances, are tall, dark & ________________(maybe after years of association, they will seem handsome too!), where I can croon,

“Imagine, there are no different Southern States,
It’s easy if you try!
Imagine all the States,
mashed up into one.
Yoo hoo, you may say I’m a dreamer,
But I am just a fan of Rohit Shetty & the promise of Chennai Express!”

Superman, sans the red underpants ....

Breaking news! Superman’s red ‘jetty’ is missing in ‘Man Of Steel’! That, I am afraid, is the most exciting bit about the new Superman movie, from the House Of Christopher Nolan!

The good news first:

The naya Superman, Henry Cavill, who impressed in ‘The Tudors’, looks like he was born to play the boy from Krypton, unlike Brandon Routh, who was a pale shadow of the superhero! The curly locks & rippling body help, though, pardon me, but at times, I felt the chest needed some support!

I was apprehensive about Amy Adams, playing the iconic Lois Lane, because Ms Adams has a history of sickeningly sweet & meek roles like in ‘Enchanted’ & ‘Doubt’. But she surprises, with her strong portrayal of a tough woman journalist, whose goes on to meet our superhero, break the fantastic story about him and about the tribe of exiled rebels, from the now extinct planet of Krypton, who want to destroy the entire human race & inhabit Planet Earth themselves.

We are treated to a guided tour of a fantasy, very futuristic looking Krypton, by Papa Russell Crowe, who then steels his heart & dispatches little Baby Steel, to Planet Earth, to protect him.

Disconcertingly, Baby Steel fast forwards, to being Man of Steel in minutes & we get glimpses of his growing up years & adopted parents, Kevin Costner & Diane Lane, in bits & pieces - where his dad teaches him to control his strength & not use it, to avoid drawing attention to himself.

Oh, I forgot, my dear readers, no more good news.

If I have to find one solo reason as to why the modern day Superman fails, it has to be that Clark Kent, the movie & whole concept, seem very dated. Quite ironical, since Superman was the original superhero on the screen, but the franchise has failed to keep up with the times! Man of Steel unfortunately, lacks the cool quotient of the superheroes of today, like Iron Man, Spiderman or all the Avengers – they are all so hip, with so many witty one liners, have their quirky, comical moments, that in comparison, Superman ends up looking like their dull, old fashioned cousin! Just shedding the red underpants ‘aint enough for a makeover – yeh dil maange more!

Laborious time is spent introducing Krypton, then explaining why Superman has to keep the super stuff hidden, so as not to be spotted & then, the never ending fights – apparently, we need to send a fight master from Bollywood to teach ‘em a few moves, because in the climax, in the supreme battle between Superman & Gen Zod, all they do is fling each other violently against huge skyscrapers, forever & we were worried that there would be no buildings left in New York! After all that, Superman calmly kills Gen Zod, by wringing his neck – why the heck didn’t he do it earlier & save us all that agony?! That & for many other pertinent questions to be answered, I need a tête-à-tête, with the director, Zack Snyder.

When Lois Lane spots the ‘S’ sign, on Superman’s outfit, she wonders what it stands for. The Man of Steel flashes a rare smile and replies that in his planet, it is a symbol of hope. Which is what I went for the movie with, ‘hope’ in my heart for a great Superman experience, from the dream team of Nolan & Snyder – they almost got it right – just forgot to add that final dash of seasoning of a few laughs, some modern times, a hint of romance & that extra something, to make the viewer soar with Superman!

A friend of mine who heard that the red underpants were missing, asked a logical question –
“So what does he wear instead?!”

This being a family platform, I don’t dare answer that!!!